Jun 12, 2014

Here are the eight nations I will be cheering hardest for in the 2014 World Cup:

1. USA
2. The Cantons of Helvetica (Switzerland)
3. Spain
4. Honduras
5. Costa Rica
6. Holland
7. Ghana
8. Ecuador

The list is descending order, thus, if No 1 (USA) met No 2 (CH) in a match, I would support the USA.  I will support the USA against all possible opponents, and there is only one team that Switzerland could play wherein I would not support them, the USA.  

I like Switzerland because my parents used to live in Basel, and my father still does much of the year; and because I have a weird softness for that bizarre proud country.

I like Spain because their players are beautiful, they play a beautiful brand of football with a goofy nickname -- tika taka -- and they always seem to exude class on and off the pitch.

I like Honduras and Costa Rica because they are tiny nations that seriously over-perform and get very little respect.  

Go La Bicolor!

I like Holland for their gorgeous uniforms, and their exciting lively brand of football (even though lately they have become quite goonish), and the way they always have their fans pull marketing stunts in the crowd to piss off their opposition.

Ghana is my favorite African nation.  They know how to win, and they are the USA's nemesis.

Ecuador is my favorite Central or South American nation because they are a very tiny nation, too, and get very little respect.

This list will have to change as the tournament progresses, and it will, and I will update it over the next month.  It has to change because as even a footy novice will notice, very few of those teams in my Top 8 have any legitimate chance to make it deep in to the tournament.  Only Spain and Holland from my list would count as serious contenders.  Ghana would be a dark horse.  If I had to make a Top 8 of simply legitimate sides, it would look like this:

1. Spain
2. Brazil
3. Ghana
4. Germany
5. Uruguay
6. France
7. Italy
8. Argentina

France is a toughie.  Normally they would be in my opening Top 8, but they kind of broke my heart at the last World Cup, with all their prima donna behavior, and mutiny.  If they are on their form, and keep it classy, they could move up my list very quickly.  

Now, there is a bottom of the list, as well.  These are the four nations I like the least, and will be rooting against.  

29.  Belgium
30. Mexico
31. (tie) England

I can not explain it fully, but I can not stand Belgium.  Mexico are the USA's mortal enemy, and if England and Portugal met in this year's World Cup, I would hope for a power outage.  I hate both of them so much.  Portugal for their crappy sportsmanship, and CR7; and England because of their smug nasty homer xenophobic fans.  

World Cup starts today! Go Croatia!


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