Jul 4, 2012

An extremely short play by Ardent Henry.


Setting:  The bedroom of a condo in an East Bay suburb.

It is early in the morning of July 4th, 2012.  WIFE is standing over the bed, as HUSBAND lays peacefully half-asleep, their blind CAT on top of him.  

WIFE reaches for the remote to turn on the teevee and says, 

WIFE:  So, we'll turn on the Channel of Hate for you then?

HUSBAND sits bolt upright in bed.  CAT goes flying, loses her balance, and falls off the bed.

HUSBAND:  No! No! No Fox News today! Not on July 4th --

WIFE reaches for the cable remote.

WIFE:  Well, what channel is sports then?

HUSBAND:  Thirty-eight.  (Brief pause.) No! No! No sports today! Not on July 4th --

But it is too late and WIFE has already turned the teevee on to ESPN.  HUSBAND rubs his eyes, and gazes at the magic box, saying, 

HUSBAND:  Oh.  It is Federer at Wimbledon.

WIFE:  Well, that is alright, then.  He is Swiss, right?

WIFE throws both remotes on to the bed and exits upstage right.  HUSBAND sighs and rolls over on to his side to resume sleeping.  CAT barely leaps on to bed and crawls slowly to the sleeping HUSBAND, whereupon she climbs on his hip and falls asleep, herself.


P.S.  Federer won in straight sets.

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